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YOU KNOW YOU'VE BEEN IN UKRAINE FOR TOO LONG WHEN:

• Cyrillic doesn't confuse you.

• You have perfected your own "borsch" recipe. (traditional soup)

• You walk past a litter bin on fire, and you think it's normal

• You say "pozhaluysta" (please) without expecting someone to say, "thank you."

• You find yourself wearing white socks with black shoes.

• You feel comfortable walking outside with -10 Celsius, not wearing a hat or gloves.

• Someone walking a stroller outside with -20 Celsius does no longer call your attention.

• You want to drive a large 4×4 to make yourself feel like a man.

• You start to hate Marshrutkas. (Mini-buses)

• You can drink beer like you used to drink coffee –morning, day, and night.

• You can drink vodka even before you start a meal.

• You can clean and eat "semechki" (sunflower seeds) with one hand and finish the pack within 90-minutes.

• You go to a movie theater and leave on your seat popcorns and empty cans.

• You have developed a system to separate all the Yulias and Svetas in your phonebook.

• You accept that your date will be late 30 minutes or more.

• You've forgotten what a queue is.

• You stop calling it a restaurant and start calling it restoran.

• You can get on the bus before all the babushkas (old ladies).

• You have discovered a certain charm in the absolute rudeness of store staff.

• You love Ukrainian Karaoke.

• You can easily use squat toilets and breathe in them.

• You go to an Italian restaurant and expect to be able to order sushi.

• You look at people's shoes and make judgments on their personalities.

• You let yourself wear a vest, white trousers, and white shoes.

• You boil eggs and make a picnic before taking the train.

• You've forgotten what copyright or eco-friendly means.

• You are comfortable sitting naked in the sauna.

• You do not notice the garbage on the floor in your building's backyard.

• You no longer feel compelled to help the elder stand up or give your seat on a bus.

• You started using contradictory answers as: "da niet', 'mozhet bit da,' or 'vozmozhno net.' (yes-no, maybe yes, probably no)

• You stand still and don't talk in the subway.

• You've pretty much stopped any public displays of emotion.

• You no longer fear alcoholic shots.

• You no longer think you'll get sick if walking barefoot on the cold floor.

• You've stopped trying to teach people that politics and governance can be different.

• For no apparent reason, you know the name of 6 oligarchs (multi-millionaires).

• You find yourself thinking you can break the rules if they collide with your interests.

• You no longer need to be drunk to dance, sing, or address yourself to the gorgeous lady.

• You ask a complete stranger for a cigarette and can even drink vodka with him.

• It is -20 Celsius outside; a lady walking in a mini-skirt doesn't surprise you.

• You don't panic when your hot water stops running because you know it will come back.

• You always keep a large water bottle behind the toilet to flush when there's no water.

• You can keep your balance walking on broken pavement, icy, or with ½ meter snow.

• You no longer lose your time explaining to a lost stranger which best direction to take.

• Police are not to respect… but to avoid by any means.

• You no longer worry about where or how you can park your car or fear getting a fine.

• You make yourself presentable whenever you leave the house, go on a date, buy toilet paper, or dump the garbage.

• To any problem that may appear, there's always a way around or someone you know...

• You do not even think about asking for the complaining book when service is terrible.

• You even know what a "Gopnik" is. (photo)

1 comment

1 Comment


srecko.warplane
srecko.warplane
Jun 21, 2021

🤣😂😂

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